Chakra Discussions

A change of heart

by Mrs. Aarti Agarwal

Posted May 6, 2005

I am a resident of Singapore. My husband has been following the Vaishnava movement for the past two years. When I married him, It was very hard for me to follow Krishna consciousness. I was running away from it.

My husband's godbrother, who had been in the Hare Krishna movement for the past ten years, used to come to my house to give us personal guidance. Blinded by Maya, I had feared losing my husband if he were to continue in the movement, since it refers to taking sannyasa. My husband's godbrother tried for a year, but eventually could not take my ill behaviour, as I used to leave the room during lectures.

I was torn in my heart. I did not like my behaviour myself, but I just could not get rid of it, nor was I aware of my husband's unhappiness. One day, however, I saw him crying and calling Krishna for help. He so much wanted that I should become a devotee also.

One night I dreamt something miraculous: a light coming towards me that went straight into my heart. The same day, at 4 a.m., I heard a beautiful voice like an echo. The rather masculine voice told me to get up and do Krishna's prayer. For me, the miracle was that I felt the voice very close to my ear, loud and clear enough, yet my husband said he had heard nothing. That voice kept ringing in my heart.

When I woke up, I realized that my heart and mind had changed completely. I ran to Krishna's murti, fell at His lotus feet and worshipped Him.

The next day I asked my husband about the principle of prayer, chanting, cooking and all. I was guided well, and was enthusiastic day by day. My husband felt a miracle himself after observing the changes in me.

Now he sometimes asks my help for devotional service and to have more enthusiasm, such as I have now. I have engaged so much in Krishna's service that I am not as concerned with myself now. Please accept my humble greeting.